In The Wind
by qrx
Summary: AU. After a year of searching for Doyle, Emily learns that all is not what it appears to be when her cover is blown, and she becomes public enemy number one courtesy of the CIA.
1. Chapter 1

_Present Day_

_March 16th, 2012  
>8:50 p.m.<br>Jareau Household _

Jennifer Jareau collapsed on to her living room couch and let out a deep sigh, grateful that she finally had a moment to herself. It had been a horrible day, which by JJ's standards was saying something. The role she had been forced to play made her feel sick, and deceitful, but most of all it just made her feel sad.

It was the first anniversary of Emily's "death", and being that it was a Saturday the team had all decided to get together for a celebration of her life. They met at her grave in the late afternoon; there they had a silent moment together before saying a few words. Afterwards, they all went out to eat at one of Emily's favorite restaurants. The mood was light and friendly, and the team shared their favorite Emily stories. There was a lot of laughter, and some tears.

When the meal was finished they walked out of the restaurant and stood for several minutes, taking in the cool nighttime air. Each team member felt a certain reluctance when they began to say their good byes, but still each knew they needed time alone, to honor, and remember Emily in the way they each saw fit.

Rossi was heading out to his cabin with Muggie and a bottle of scotch, Garcia was going home to share her collection of girl's night out pictures with Kevin, and Reid decided he would read a couple of Kurt Vonnegut books. But it wasn't until JJ realized that Morgan was heading back to the cemetery that the impact of what they had done hit her full force.

As she and Hotch watched the team head their separate ways she began to cry, silent tears slipping down her face. If only she could tell them the truth. It would only take a couple of minutes to explain what had really happened, and it might take a while for the team to forgive them, but at least their pain would be taken away.

That was all she wanted, was to take away the deep, throbbing pain of loss. Because not matter how bright and hot the pain of betrayal might burn, its life was short and the pain would eventually be extinguished with time and care.

"Do you ever regret what we did?" JJ asked Hotch, her voice wavered slightly with emotion.

"No." He turned to look at her, "Do you?"

"No," JJ sighed as she watched a group friends stumble out of a bar across the street, laughing and joking as they went. "I know what we did was for the best… I know that faking her death was the best option we had… But sometimes I think keeping it from the team was a mistake."

"I know what you mean." Hotch said heavily as he took out a tissue from his pocket and handed it to JJ, "But what's done is done. All we can do now is hope that she comes home soon, and that when she does the team will be understanding."

JJ nodded in agreement and dabbed her tears with the tissue.

"Well, I should head back. Will and Henry will be home soon."

Hotch nodded and gave JJ a small smile.

"I'll see you Monday then."

"See you." JJ turned and started to walk toward her car.

"JJ!" Hotch called.

"Yes?"

"If you ever want to talk… My door is always open."

JJ smiled, "Thanks Hotch, I'll keep that in mind."

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><p>JJ let out another sigh and looked around the living room. It looked as if a tornado had touched down, Henry's toys were everywhere, and some couch cushions and pillows were piled up making a small fort in the middle of the room. JJ stood up and began picking up the toys and putting them back were they belonged. She wished Henry were with her, she really needed a hug and a chance to hear his laughter. As she began to deconstruct the cushion fort she noticed another toy sitting inside it. JJ's heart leapt once she recognized the small toy and pulled out of the cushy fortress. It was a stuffed bear that Emily had given Henry on his first birthday, now three years later it is still his favorite toy.<p>

JJ felt her eyes starting to well up with tears again, "God Em, I miss you."

Just then the front door was thrown open and Henry came running into the living room.

"Mommy we're home!"

"I see that!" JJ said smiling, "Do I get a hug?"

Henry giggled and jumped into JJ's waiting arms.

"Oh I missed you so much!" JJ said, "How was you're day?"

"Good! We went to the park, and we got ice cream, and I got two scoops!" Henry proclaimed proudly.

"Wow, that sounds yummy!" JJ said as she made her way over to Will.

"Yeah! And I ate it all and we got popcorn at the movies, and soda, and candy!"

"Well, someone certainly hit the sugar jackpot today."

Will shrugged sheepishly, "He asked nicely."

JJ laughed and kissed Will, "Well, as long as he asks nicely I guess he can have whatever he wants."

"Really?" Henry asked hopefully.

"No." JJ and Will replied in unison.

Henry frowned slightly in disappointment before he noticed what JJ was holding.

"You found Agent Cuddles!" He declared.

"Yeah, he was in your fort." JJ said handing the bear to him.

"He was looking for it all morning," Will said, "He wanted to take Agent Cuddles to see the movie."

"Oh Mommy! The movie was so cool!"

JJ's cell phone began to ring and Will looked at her uneasily.

"I hope that's not a case."

"We can only pray." JJ muttered as she picked up the phone, "Jareau."

"And then the cars turned into robots!"

"Shh Henry, Mommy's on the phone …Hello?"

"JJ!"

"Hotch?"

"Turn on your TV now!"

"Then there was a huge explosion!" Henry shouted as he demonstrated the magnitude of the explosion by knocking down the rest of the fort.

"Henry, be quiet I'm trying to listen … What did you say Hotch?"

"Turn on the news!" Hotch said, his voice seething with anger.

JJ quickly crossed the living room and turned the TV on to the news channel.

She frowned, "Um... this is just showing me the weather forcast."

"Just wait a second." He growled, "It's coming up."

"JJ, what's the matter?" Will asked, moving over to stand next to JJ. She shrugged helplessly, confusion and worry written all over her face. She hadn't heard Hotch sound this angry in a long time.

"Then the other robot started shooting and-"

"Henry, please!" JJ practically shouted, "Sit on the couch and wait till Mommy is off the phone, then you can tell me all about the movie."

Henry nodded sheepishly, shuffled over to the couch and sat down heavily.

"Hotch please just tell me what's going on!" JJ said exasperatedly, she wasn't in the mood for jokes or games. But at the same time she wished it was a joke because from what she could tell by Hotch's voice, she was about to get some very bad news.

"You might want to sit down." Hotch growled, as the weather forecast started to end. JJ started to back up slowly toward the couch when _Breaking News_ flashed across the screen.

The news anchor began to speak and JJ felt the color drain from her face, her hands shook with anger.

"What…the…fuck…" JJ gasped.

"Hey!" Henry declared excitedly pointing at the picture that had just appeared on the screen. "It's Auntie Em!"

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	2. Chapter 2

**I just wanted to thank everyone for their reviews and subscriptions!  
>I hope you all enjoy the next chapter :)<strong>

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><p><em>One Day Earlier<br>__March 15__th__, 2012  
><em>_9:00 p.m.  
><em>_Rome, Italy_

The night was young and as the sun set, darkness over took the sky and evening the shades of yellow, orange, purple, and blue vanished with the sun into the gloom. Emily sat at the table in the back of the bar watching the beams of sun light slowly slip from the top of her table, over the chair, and out the window.

Clyde was late.

Clyde was never late.

Emily and Clyde Easter had been meeting at least once a month for the past year. She would report her findings and he would give her the recent leads the CIA had on Doyle and his arms dealing buddies. So far they had taken out or captured several key members of Doyle's organization, but no sign of Doyle himself. The CIA was impressed, they seemed content with just the dismantling Doyle's organization, but what they were forgetting was that Emily could not go home until Doyle himself was out of the picture.

Or maybe they weren't forgetting.

Clyde had also passed along several messages to Emily from the case officer, Teresa Pearce, stating that the CIA would very much like Emily to rejoin the CIA…permanently. Emily politely declined the offer the first time, and when the offers persisted she simply told Clyde to stick Teresa's offer where the sun don't shine. Needless to say, Cylde was more gracious with his wording when he relayed Emily's refusals to Teresa.

"Where the hell are you Clyde?" Emily muttered as she surveyed the bar patrons. She was tired of these spy games. Over the past year she had begun to feel worn out, all the hiding, and the lies seemed to be applying a constant pressure to her conscience that could not be relieved. She was anxious all the time, and that feeling was growing with each minute that Clyde did not show.

Emily was starting to consider leaving when the front door swung open and Clyde entered the bar. Immediately, some of her anxiety was eased but the feeling quickly returned once she realized Clyde was not alone. He was accompanied by a rather small, but very thin, older woman, dressed in a pencil skirt and a white blouse. In other words, she looked very out of place in this shithole of a bar. The woman stopped at the bar counter but Clyde continued on his way over to Emily's table.

"What the hell Clyde?" Emily snapped as Clyde took the seat across from her.

"Em… I mean Jacqueline…" Clyde started,

"What, is it bring your grandma work day? Or did you two just decide to stop by on your way to dinner and the movies?" Emily hissed, as she leaned to the side trying to get a better look at the woman, "Jesus, she looks like a little goblin playing dress up. People notice little goblins Clyde! Are you trying to get my cover blown?"

"Jacqueline, please!" Clyde interrupted, "That's Teresa Pearce, she's your case handler in case you forgot."

"What is she doing here? I thought the whole point of your job was to be the go between for me and the CIA, that way we could avoid meetings like this."

Clyde looked over his shoulder at Teresa who was starting to make her way toward the table, three drinks in hand.

"Please listen to me." Cylde whispered leaning in close, "Pearce is going to tell you some things you are not going to like. But I beg you, listen to what she has to say and think very carefully before you answer."

Emily frowned, she did not like this.

"And remember," Clyde added, "I was in the dark as much as you are, I had no idea what was going on until today."

No… she did not like this one bit.

She opened her mouth to speak but promptly shut it once Teresa arrived. She set the drinks down on the table, and took the seat next to Clyde.

"Emily, I have to say it's a pleasure to finally meet you." Teresa said warmly.

"Actually ma'am, it's Jacqueline." Emily corrected with a tight smile.

"Oh please!" Teresa said dismissively, with a wave of her hand, "We don't have to worry about that undercover nonsense right now."

"I'm sorry?"

"I didn't know what you both liked," Teresa said, ignoring Emily, "So I just ordered us all a beer, I hope that's okay."

"Thank you, ma'am." Clyde said, taking a drink.

"Emily?" Teresa slid one of the beers across the table.

"No thank you," Emily declined, pushing the beer back to Teresa. "I'm on the clock."

Clyde shot Emily a look, but she ignored him.

"Smartass." he muttered to himself.

If Teresa was offended or taken aback she didn't show it, she simply continued to smile and took a drink of her own beer.

_She hiding something_, Emily quickly realized, and that didn't bode well.

They were all silent for a bit, Emily was watching Teresa intently and in return Teresa was doing the same. Both sizing each other up, searching for signs of weakness, or strength, but in the end neither gave up a thing. Clyde was about to speak up when Teresa broke the silence.

"Emily, I must say, we at the CIA are astounded that you have been able to accomplish as much as you have this past year."

Emily frowned, "I'm sorry, I don't quite follow."

"You're progress in dismantling Ian Doyle's organization is better than anything we could have hoped for, and I came here not only to commend you on your work, but also to tell you-"

"Excuse me for a moment," Emily interrupted, "But when I was _forced_ into this assignment after Doyle escaped in Boston, I was told that my _only_ job was to track Doyle down and take him out. All the work that I have done concerning the "dismantling of his organization" has just been a by-product of my search for him. Finding Ian Doyle is my only goal, and I haven't found him yet. So I'm forgive me if I sound a little forward but, why are you congratulation me on a job I'm not even supposed to be doing?"

Emily glanced at Clyde but he refused to make eye contact. He looked tense, nervous, and he kept fidgeting with his half empty beer bottle. He knew what was going on but he was refusing to say anything. Coward.

Emily looked back at the other woman and realized, the warm, friendly, demeanor Teresa had made a show of displaying earlier was gone.

The Teresa Pearce that was sitting across from her was cold, with a calculating and careful gaze. A queen of manipulation who loved watching people as they scurried around like ants, doing her bidding. A queen who enjoyed squishing those ants just as much as she enjoyed telling them what to do.

_And so she reveals her true goblin nature_. Emily thought to herself.

"Emily, I don't know how to tell you this," She began cautiously, "But finding Ian Doyle was never your primary objective."

Emily felt her stomach drop.

"I don't follow..."

"I understand that finding Doyle is what we may have led you to believe your task was, but in truth finding Ian Doyle was never our goal."

"Ian Doyle is the only reason I have been in hiding for the past year! How is finding him not your goal?" Emily snapped.

"This is whole situation is much bigger than one man. When we had Doyle arrested all those years ago, we hoped that once he was out of the picture the organization would crumble. But we were wrong, it continued to thrive and grow, and no matter what we did we could not bring it down. The CIA needed someone who had experience in the organization and who could work without limitations."

"You used me." Emily said her voice void of all emotion.

"Yes, when Ian Doyle almost killed you the opportunity was too good to pass up. Once you were declared dead, you became an untraceable agent, one that could bypass all the regulations and red tape, our ghost. The only problem was we knew you would never willingly agree to help us, so we were forced to take matters into our own hands. We told you Ian Doyle had escaped and then set you lose upon the world. You tore the organization apart from the inside out in you desperate attempt to find him. It is as good as dead now… there is nothing more you can do here."

Emily's mind was reeling, her conscience was desperately trying to figure out what her subconscious seemed to already know. The CIA's only concern was the organization and not with the man who started it… They were never look for Ian Doyle… Which could mean only one thing…

"You know where Doyle is." Emily said, her voice barely above a whisper. Teresa's lack of response only confirmed her suspicion. Emily sat completely still. She was trying hard to keep her emotions in check, but her walls were finally beginning to crumble. Rage seeped through the cracks. A years worth of frustration and heartache threatened to spill out.

She had been used…

"You've known this whole time."

A year of her life wasted...

"Where is he?"

To say she was angry...

"Somewhere safe." Teresa replied evenly, "He was captured by the CIA in France two days after your encounter at the warehouse."

Was a gross understatment...

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	3. Chapter 3

_March 15__th__, 2012  
><em>_9:15 p.m.  
><em>_Rome, Italy_

She had been tricked… played… so blinded by her thirst for revenge and her need to return home that she had not seen the bigger picture. How many times had she felt something was amiss? And how many times did she ignore that feeling?

Emily calmly turned her icy gaze to Clyde.

"Did you know?" She asked, her voice slightly above a whisper.

"I swear to god Emily, I had no idea." Clyde said softly, he reached across the table and tried to hold her hand but she pulled away. "If I had known… I wouldn't have put you through this."

Emily didn't say anything she just turned to look out the window. The sky was dark, but the moon and stars still glowed brightly in the sky. Emily remembered the view from her apartment, the DC skyline line, and the city lights. Never before had she felt so homesick.

"He's telling the truth," Teresa piped up, "He was helpful when you needed a little…guidance. A rumor that Ian Doyle was staying here, a whisper he had been spotted there... they were all fabricated of course. Rumors that fed your obsession enough to distract you from the truth, and all the while steering you toward the real goal."

As Emily listened to Teresa she detected a hint of pride in her voice, and she couldn't stand to listen anymore. The woman was gloating. Reveling in her own brilliance, and in her ability to trick others into doing what she wanted.

"Where is Doyle?" Emily interrupted.

"I told you, he's somewhere safe. Locked up. Gone for good."

"Ian Doyle escaped from _North Korea_." Emily snarled, "So, unless you're telling me that he is in a coffin six feet under you need to make sure he gets there soon. Because there is not a force on earth that can stop him from escaping another prison, especially now that he knows his son is alive."

Teresa smirked, "Thanks for the advice, but I think the CIA can handle it."

Emily chuckled softly, "That's what North Korea said, and the way I hear it they had to use finger print records to I.D. what has left of Doyle's guards when he escaped."

"I can assure you Agent Prentiss, Ian Doyle is not going anywhere."

"You're making a huge mistake."

"I don't think so."

Emily shook her head and ran her hands wearily through her hair, _Doyle is going to eat you alive… _she thought to herself_. _

"So why are you here?" Emily asked, she struggled to keep her voice calm but it still trembled slightly with frustration and rage, "Doyle is in custody, and his organization is dead…What more could you ask for?"

"I am here to debrief you, and give you your next assignment."

"My next _assignment_?' Emily said, in disbelief.

"Yes," Teresa motioned to Clyde who pulled a manila envelope out of his jacket. "We're having problems with an arms dealer who we think has taken refugee somewhere in Russia." She began, as she started to pull pictures out of the envelope. "We need you take him into custody and-"

"No." Emily interrupted.

Teresa stopped what she was doing, and looked up from the photos.

"Clyde, could you give us a moment please?" She asked sweetly.

"Ma'am, I-"

"Now Agent Easter!"

Clyde rose slowly, and gave Emily one last pleading look before exiting the bar.

"I'm sorry I must have misheard you," Teresa said, with a laugh, "For a second there it sounded like you said, no."

"That's because I did." Teresa's smiled faded and she leaned in closer to Emily as she spoke,

"If I were you I'd take a moment to think before I made any rash decisions."

"I am not going to be your fucking pet anymore," Emily said as she rose and gathered up her bag, "You got what you wanted. Congratulations. Now if you don't mind, I'm going home."

"Agent Prentiss, you think you have a choice in whether or not you take this assignment?" Teresa asked. Emily who was on her way toward the exit, stopped and, slowly turned around.

"What the hell is that supposed to mean?" She snapped,

"It means I am giving you a direct order." Teresa pointed at the photos on the table, "You will take this assignment."

"And if I refuse?" Emily challenged. Teresa grinned, revealing a set of unnaturally white teeth.

"Oh, I don't think you want to go there."

"Watch me."

"The CIA has been protecting you all this time." Teresa said, "If you leave us now, there is no telling what might happen…"

Emily's eyes narrowed, "Are you threatening me?"

"Consider this a friendly warning." Teresa said with a smile, "If you leave the CIA without my consent I will have no choice but to declare you a rouge agent. You will be hunted by the CIA, FBI, Interpool. I will put a price on your head so high; you will never be able to go near a civilized community again. I will also go to the press, and believe me when I tell you I will paint them a portrait of you so violent and horrifying, your own mother will be afraid of you."

Emily stood still for a moment she was filled with uncertainty, fear, and rage. Anger burned hot in her chest, yet her face betrayed nothing.

"You won't go to the press."

"Oh? Why wouldn't I?" Teresa asked as she gathered up the photos that she had placed on the table and stuck them back into the envelope, "It's your choice Agent Prentiss, accept the mission or spend the rest of your short life on the run, hunted by the very government you worked so hard to serve."

After she had finished picking up the photos, she held out the envelope and offered it to Emily.

Emily was silent for a moment. She had seen Clyde's pleading eyes when he left the bar, he was begging her to take the job. But what he didn't know was that if she accepted this job, the Emily Prentiss he knew would cease to exist. She would become a machine. Working on missions nonstop, creating and adapting one cover after the next, never having the chance to be Emily Prentiss again. It was no way to live. And Emily refused to sacrifice herself in that way for an organization that had tricked and deceived her.

"Well?" Teresa asked expectantly. Emily took the envelope and held it in front of Teresa's face.

"You can take this envelope and shove it up your fucking ass, because nothing you say or do can make me accept this assignment."

Teresa grinned, her eyes gleamed with the thought of the upcoming challenge.

"I'm going to enjoy watching you burn, Agent Prentiss."

"And I'm going to enjoy taking you down with me." Emily replied coolly, as she tossed the folder onto the table and made her way to the exit.

"I will give you twenty four hours to rethink your decision." Teresa called out just as Emily was opening the door to leave, "I suggest you use that time wisely."

"Don't hold your breath." Emily said, and with that she slipped out of the bar and disappeared into the night.

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><p><strong>I hope this chapter, or any other chapter was too confusing. Of course feel free to ask me any questions that you might have. The next chapter will focus on the team, and I should have it up either by tomorrow or the day after. <strong>

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